Things Teenagers Say Volume 26

Hi all!  Hope you're enjoying the snow or the crazy warm January temps or whatever other weather phenomenon Mother Nature has decided to send your way.  I finally feel like I'm getting settled into the new semester, and I'm hoping that there will be lots more blogging going on here soon!

Until then, I hope you enjoy the latest bunch of crazy things teenagers say.


Previous Volumes:
Volume 1 | Volume 2 | Volume 3 | Volume 4 | Volume 5  
Volume 6 | Volume 7 | Volume 8 | Volume 9 | Volume 10
Volume 11 | Volume 12 | Volume 13 | Volume 14 | Volume 15
Volume 16 | Volume 17 | Volume 18 | Volume 19 | Volume 20
Volume 21 | Volume 22 | Volume 23 | Volume 24 | Volume 25


Student: She's being hair-colorist.
Me: She's being what?!?
Student: Ya know...like being sexist or racist.  Hair-colorist.

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Student: Ms. Hagan, do you know the school wifi password?
Me: Nope.  Sorry.  I don't.
Student: I bet your wifi password is "catvegetable24."

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My goal is not to know how to do algebra. My goal is to be able to go shopping and not look at the price tags.

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I know what I want my funeral to be like.  I'm going to be wrapped up in a sheet and roll down a hill on fire. 

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Ms. Hagan is the most confusing woman you could ever meet.

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Student: I shot three ducks this weekend.
Me: I thought you raised ducks.  Why would you shoot them?
Student: I give my ducks names, so I couldn't shoot them.  But, I don't know if the Canadians give their ducks names.  So, I don't feel bad about killing them.

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Did you know that you can grow a foot taller if you drink a cup of lizard pee every day for a month?

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 My brother's name is Heath.  But, he hates Heath Bars.  I just find that ironic.

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If there is ever a school shooter, I want to be in coach's room.  I feel like he would body slam him.  I saw him do push-ups once, and I was like maaaaan!  

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Why are we acting like a funeral in here?

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I don't like math, so I decided not to write you a letter.

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Ms. Kipp is our nutritional teacher.  And, I saw her walking around with a can of coke yesterday. Can you believe that?!?

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Asia IS Korea.

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Why would you want your scentsy to smell like your boyfriend?

[For the record, this was not said to me.  My scentsy smells like pomegranates.]

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You're going to be ugly for the rest of your life.  You might as well do it now.

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Have you ever had a yawn gone wrong?

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A Canadian goose named Jim lives in my yard.   

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I feel like one of those people with plastic surgery gone wrong because I can only open one side of my mouth.

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When people are dead, they float until they sink.

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Me: I don't know anything about Hogwarts.
Student: I thought you were a nerd.

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Your hair makes you look like a paintbrush.

--

Student 1: Are you having a bad hair day? 
Student 2: No. I just don't bother to fix my hair anymore. 
Student 1: How are you going to pick up females like that? 
Student 3: With his pickup truck.
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