My students continue to spout off the most random statements in class. For your benefit and enjoyment, I record them here on a regular basis.
Check Out Previous Volumes Here:
Volume 1 | Volume 2 | Volume 3 | Volume 4 | Volume 5
Volume 6 | Volume 7 | Volume 8 | Volume 9 | Volume 10
--
Me: Class, does anybody have a good thing to share today?
Student: I caught a fish this weekend that didn't have a dorsal fin.
#Random
--
Student 1: Ms. Hagan, what's your good thing?
Me: Well, I got a letter in the mail saying I got accepted to grad school.
Student 2: You're not leaving are you?
Me: No, I'm not planning on leaving anytime soon.
Student 2: The last teacher who said she wasn't leaving us got knocked up and moved.
Student 3: I'm pretty sure it's not called getting knocked up if you and your husband decide to have a baby.
--
Check Out Previous Volumes Here:
Volume 1 | Volume 2 | Volume 3 | Volume 4 | Volume 5
Volume 6 | Volume 7 | Volume 8 | Volume 9 | Volume 10
--
Me: Class, does anybody have a good thing to share today?
Student: I caught a fish this weekend that didn't have a dorsal fin.
#Random
--
Student 1: Ms. Hagan, what's your good thing?
Me: Well, I got a letter in the mail saying I got accepted to grad school.
Student 2: You're not leaving are you?
Me: No, I'm not planning on leaving anytime soon.
Student 2: The last teacher who said she wasn't leaving us got knocked up and moved.
Student 3: I'm pretty sure it's not called getting knocked up if you and your husband decide to have a baby.
--
You better bump up my grade or it's about to get real in here.
--
Me: On the top of your folder, write last name comma first name.
Student: Isn't it going to be confusing that everyone's folder says the same thing?
This student literally wrote "Last Name, First Name" on his manila folder...
Me: On the top of your folder, write last name comma first name.
Student: Isn't it going to be confusing that everyone's folder says the same thing?
This student literally wrote "Last Name, First Name" on his manila folder...
--
Guys! Look at Ms. Hagan. She looks like a serial killer right now. It's okay, though.
--
--
Student: I swallowed a fluffy thing and it got stuck in my throat and it got infected. But, I went to the doctor, and they gave me an inhaler. So, I'm going to be okay.
Me: You swallowed a what?
Student: A fluffy thing.
Me: What's a fluffy thing?
Student: Do you know what those little fluffy things are inside pillows? I swallowed one of those.
--
Me: You swallowed a what?
Student: A fluffy thing.
Me: What's a fluffy thing?
Student: Do you know what those little fluffy things are inside pillows? I swallowed one of those.
--
My sister ran over a coyote with her car. Did you know you can get $50 if you kill a coyote?
--
--
A few months ago, my grandmother's aunt died. And, they cremated her. Well, this weekend we had a ceremony for her. I thought that was weird because ceremonies are only supposed to be for weddings. But, they put her ashes in a jar, and we buried the ashes.
--
--
I have two cats. One cat is an obese cat. The other cat is a skinny cat. And, the obese cat is scared of the skinny cat.
--
--
I can't do my homework at home. My cat is obsessed with me.
--
--
Ms. Hagan, are you EVER going to be absent?
--
Ms. Hagan, I know how you could meet a guy. You could go to Stillwater to OSU where the grad students are. Then, you should stand outside the building looking really lost. When somebody asks what you are looking for, you can say "I'm looking for you."
--
--
Ms. Hagan, I know how you could meet a guy. You could go to Stillwater to OSU where the grad students are. Then, you should stand outside the building looking really lost. When somebody asks what you are looking for, you can say "I'm looking for you."
--
Me: What did Thomas Edison invent?
<Blank Stares>
Me: Come on, guys. What did Thomas Edison invent?
Student 1: Oh, isn't he the guy that who discovered electricity?
Student 1: Oh, isn't he the guy that who discovered electricity?
Student 2: No, that was Ben Franklin.
Student 3: I thought Albert Einstein invented electricity.
Student 4: Just because Albert Einstein looks like he got electrocuted, it doesn't mean he invented electricity.
Student 2: Albert Einstein is the one who invented math.
In another class the same day:
Student 1: Albert Einstein is the guy who invented math.
Student 2: I bet he has a lot of haters, then.
Me: Albert Einstein didn't invent math.
Student 1: Then, what did he do?
Student 3: Albert Einstein worked on the atomic bomb.
Student 1: Oh. We've never had a nuclear bomb before, though. Isn't it true that if there was a nuclear bomb, it would start World War III?
Student 3: Have you ever heard of Hiroshima and Nagasaki?
Student 1: Yes. But, those were just regular bombs. If they were nuclear bombs, I would know it.
Student 3: They were called atomic bombs for a reason.
Student 1: Yeah, ATOMIC bombs. Not nuclear bombs. We've never had a nuclear bomb before.